Graduation Gown for Transgender Student Becomes an Issue at Catholic H.S.

A Catholic high school in Albuquerque is insisting that a male transgender student wear a girl’s graduation robe at the school’s commencement ceremonies next week.

Damian Garcia

Damian Garcia transitioned last year and changed his name from Brandi Garcia, which is the name on his birth certificate.  KQRE-TV reports that St. Pius High School, which requires male graduates to wear black robes and female graduates to wear white robes, is insisting that Damian wear a white robe.  Damian stated:

“I just want to walk in my black robe, nice and proud and have that memory to look back on with my family and friends. I would rather not walk than to embarrass myself by wearing a female robe.”

The teachers and students at the school all refer to him as “Damian,” and his parents support his gender transition and wearing a black robe.

The television statement captured the remarks of Damian’s father, Luis Garcia:

“I look at him and I call him my son. That’s how he wishes to be acknowledged is as a male. . . All you want in life is to see your kids happy and healthy. You never want to see them suffer or being ridiculed or be made fun of.”

School officials say that if there is a question about which color robe to wear, they are guided by the information on a student’s birth certificate, and Damian’s birth certificate says “female.”

The school’s reasoning shows the problems that can occur when rules become more important than human beings and human reality.  For officials to say that they cede all of their ability to make a judicious decision based on the birth certificate, and not the human and social reality with which they are faced,  is ignorant and insensitive.

This situation highlights another important issue:  why are graduation robes “gendered” in the the first place?  Why must boys wear one color and girls another color?  A simple solution would be to eliminate the color distinction, since it serves no meaningful purpose anyway.

An important lesson to be learned from this story, too, is that parental love for a child can often lead the way for the rest of the church to learn how to love and accept transgender people and other sexual and gender minorities.   The love of Damian’s parents, expressed by his father, is awe-inspiring, and reminds us of the unconditional love that God has for each of us.  So often our Catholic faith reminds us that God loves each of us as a parent.  It would be well for the officials at this Catholic school to learn a lesson from Damian’s parents on how to love and accept and treasure each student.

–Francis DeBernardo, New Ways Ministry

NEWS NOTES: May 17, 2013

Here are some items that you may find of interest:

1) Today, May 17th, is the International Day Against Homophobia and Transphobia.  GayStarNews  reports that, for the first time, Catholic churches in Italy will be hosting prayer services to commemorate the day.

2) Peace Advocacy Network, a Philadelphia non-profit, will be protesting a “sports camp” for gay man, to be held on the grounds of the Archdiocese of Philadelphia’s seminary, St. Charles Borromeo, on May 23rd.  The sports program is sponsored by Courage, a group which promotes celibacy for lesbian and gay people, and which sometimes promotes the discredited “reparative therapy” to change a person’s orientation.  According to Metro.us, the sports camp ”claims to help gay men repair their ‘sports wound’ and become ‘manlier’ – in so many words, performing ‘conversion therapy’ to ‘reform’ their homosexuality.” 

3) The Vatican is asking San Juan, Puerto Rico’s Archbishop Roberto Octavio González Nieves, to  step down from his position, but Gonzalez Nieves is refusing to leave.  According to Latin Times, the Vatican’s action against the archbishop is prompted by “allegations of protecting pedophile priests, abusing his power, promoting Puerto Rican independence, and supporting a law that would allow gay couples living together, hereditary rights.”

4) In Zambia,  a Catholic priest who is running for the nation’s presidency, has stated that he will not arrest gay and lesbian people, and that he supports marriage equality.  According to The Times of Zambia, “Father [Frank] Bwalya said he would respect homosexuals, claiming this was in line with the Catholic Church which prescribed respect for every individual.”

5) The Vatican has confirmed that Scotland’s Cardinal Keith O’Brien, who resigned earlier this year when it was revealed that he had sexually molested several seminarians and priests,  would be leaving the British country for “spiritual renewal,” according to The Daily Mail.  Earlier, O’Brien had refused to leave the country though many Catholic leaders felt his presence was divisive. O’Brien had been an outspoken critic of LGBT equality and justice in the UK.

6)  QueeringTheChurch.com reports on a set of “gay mysteries” of the Rosary, developed by Stephen Lovatt.  The mysteries are:  the healing of the Centurion’s boy, the answering of the Rich Young Ruler, the raising from the dead of Lazarus, the Last Supper, and the Kiss of Judas.

–Francis DeBernardo, New Ways Ministry

 

 

 

Transgender Politician’s Rise Reveals Changing Polish Church

Anna Grodzka, speaking in the Polish parliament

In a sign of the Catholic hierarchy’s waning influence over Polish politics, the nation’s first transgender legislator nearly assumed a top government office earlier this month.

Anna Grodzka was elected in 2011 to parliament from a conservative district in Krakow. Her election stirred anti-transgender opposition from fellow legislators. Several refused to acknowledge Grodzka’s gender identity while other members publicly disparaged her, and citizens have vandalized her offices.

Opposition has failed to stop Grodzka’s assent in Palikot’s Movement, Poland’s third-largest and progressive political party of which she is a member. The party’s leadership recently nominated Grodzka for deputy speaker of parliament, considered the second most powerful position in government. ABC News reports on the outcome:

“She lost that chance [for deputy speaker] on Friday when lawmakers voted overwhelmingly to keep the incumbent [Wanda Nowicka] in the job…

“Grodzka, who has expressed admiration for Nowicka’s work, was among those who voted to keep Nowicka in place. After the vote, she said she was not upset by the outcome.

“’I don’t regret it — believe me,’ she said.”

Grodzka’s election from a district in Krakow, where former Pope John Paul II was once archbishop, and her rise in national politics illustrate a further shift from the Catholic Church’s once-powerful control of the direction of government.

Her party, Palikot’s Movement, is raising its profile with an agenda of LGBT rights and resistance to traditional church influences. ABC News notes the significance this transgender member of parliament has had:

“Even so, the 58-year-old has already had a huge impact on the political scene, becoming perhaps the most prominent symbol of liberal change in a country that has traditionally been deeply conservative and overwhelmingly Roman Catholic…

“The social transformation has been visible in other areas too…But it is particularly notable for the new attention given to the rights of sexual minorities, an issue suppressed in communist times and after the fall of communism in 1989, as many Poles looked to the powerful Catholic church for guidance through the economic and social turmoil.”

LGBT progress in Poland is a reality, but Grodzka and others quickly point to the failure to pass a measure that would extend legal recognition to unmarried couples of any orientation as evidence that Polish bishops continue to bear weight and the nation is not equivalent to liberal Western nations yet. For now, Grodzka focuses on serving her constituents:

“’I am above all trying to be a normal politician, like any other person, but maybe even better. I am really trying so that people who observe me will know that transgender people are no worse in any way than any others.’”

We congratulate Ms. Grodzka  for her courage and fortitude and for her shining example!

–Bob Shine, New Ways Ministry

Catholic Support for Fired Transgender Teacher

About three weeks ago, Bondings 2.0 reported on the case of Mark Krolikowski, a Catholic high school music teacher who claims he was fired because he is transgender and had been coming to work with longer hair and manicured fingernails.

Equally Blessed, a  coalition of four national Catholic organizations that work for justice and equality  for LGBT people in church and society, has published an essay in support of Krolikowski, and all transgender people, on the Washington Post’s  “On Faith blog.”  The essay is authored by Jim FitzGerald, executive director of Call To Action, an Equally Blessed coalition partner.   The essay is worth a read not just because of its support for Krolikowski, but because it provides some good information on the life experiences of transgender people.  For example, FitzGerald states:

“In an extensive 2011 nationwide survey hosted by Penn State’s Consortium on Higher Education, 78 percent of transgender people said that they had been bullied or harassed as children. Forty one percent said they had attempted suicide. Thirty-five percent had been physically assaulted and 12 percent had been sexually assaulted.

“Discrimination against transgender people is pervasive. Like Mark, 47 percent of those who responded to the survey said that they had suffered employment discrimination. Nineteen percent had suffered housing discrimination and a similar number had been denied health care due to their gender identity.”

Some progress is being made to correct old prejudices:

“Until recently the U. S. medical establishment treated transgender people as though they were mentally ill. The fourth edition of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual includes a category called “gender identity disorder,” but, in a significant breakthrough for transgender people and our society’s understanding of gender identity, the soon-to-be published fifth edition does not.”

Despite this progress in the scientific world, the religious world has a lot of catching up to do:

“As Catholics, we regret that the leaders of our church and other conservative Christian organizations are leading the fight to deny transgender people their full human dignity and equal treatment under the law. In a recent address, Pope Benedict XVI argued against the very concept of gender, saying that one’s sexual identity is determined entirely by one’s biology.”

Given the increasingly-known fact that Catholics are generally very supportive of LGBT issues such as marriage equality, it should not  come as too much of a surprise that Catholics are also supportive of transgender equality, too:

“Whatever their beliefs about human sexuality, members of the pope’s own church in this country reject discrimination against transgender people. A 2011 poll by the Public Religion Research Institute found that 93 percent of U. S. Catholics believed that transgender people deserve the same legal rights and protections as other citizens. The survey also found that approximately three-quarters of Americans-from across the political and religious spectrum-believe that Congress should pass employment nondiscrimination laws to protect transgender people. A similar majority favor Congress’s recent expansion of hate crimes legislation to protect transgender people.”

The case of Mark Krolikowski shows how strongly a wide discussion of gender and sexuality is needed in the Catholic Church.

(Equally Blessed coalition is comprised of Call To Action, DignityUSA, Fortunate Families, New Ways Ministry.)

–Francis DeBernardo, New Ways Ministry

New Ways Ministry Is Honored by Brother, Help Thyself

“Brother, Help Thyself,”  a fund-raising coalition of LGBT groups in the Baltimore-Washington,DC area   distributed their annual grants this past weekend, and New Ways Ministry was the grateful recipient of a generous grant of $8,125.

The money will be used for two upcoming projects and a new piece of office equipment:

1)  a workshop day in the Baltimore-Washington area on transgender issues;

2) a retreat day in the Baltimore-Washington area for people living with HIV/AIDS and people who minister with them;

3) a new photocopy machine to replace our cranky 16-year old one.

Mark Clark (left) presents the Billy Collison Award to New Ways Ministry’s Sister Jeannine Gramick and Francis DeBernardo.

During the ceremony, New Ways Ministry was surprised to learn that we also received “Brother, Help Thyself’s” (BHT) cherished “Billy Collison Award.”  The award, named in memory of a BHT volunteer who served in a variety of leadership positions for the group, as well as being an active volunteer in the DC area.  The award is given “For representing the LGBTQ community so well and with so little, thus truly embodying Bill Collison, a true champion of the underdog.”

In presenting the award to New Ways Ministry’s Co-Founder, Sister Jeannine Gramick, and Executive Director Francis DeBernardo, BHT Treasurer Mark Clark said:

“New Ways Ministry does what some might assume cannot be done–build bridges between the official Roman Catholic church hierarchy and the LGBT community, training people to minister to those who want to be fully themselves in their spiritual tradition and in their sexuality.”

Mark Clark accepting the Anthony J. Bacharach Award.

In accepting the award, DeBernardo said he was “dumbfounded, humbled, and honored,” and that New Ways Ministry pledged to keep the spirit of Billy Collison’s altruism for the underdog alive.

At the close of the day, BHT Treasurer Mark Clark was himself the recipient of the Anthony J. Bacharach Award for distinguished volunteer service to BHT and several other DC-based LGBT organizations, including New Ways Ministry and Dignity.

New Ways Ministry is so grateful to the tireless work of the members of Brother, Help Thyself.  Their unrelenting generosity is helping so many LGBT organizations in the Baltimore-Washington area.  The work they do benefits so many and makes our world a better place.

–Francis DeBernardo, New Ways Ministry

 

A Catholic Introduction to Transgender Issues

As we close out the week that began with the celebration of the Epiphany, we do so by offering a reflection on transgender issues by James and Evelyn Whitehead which appeared in The National Catholic Reporter.  The authors, whose lifetime of work on sexuality and relationships has been a gift to the chruch,  reflect that in the past year they have had their own “epiphany” about transgender people:

The past year has brought us deeper appreciation of the experience of transgender members of the human community. Mentored by a Catholic sister who has dedicated her life to ministry among transgender persons, we have been instructed by the witness of these often vulnerable members of the body of Christ. Their life stories carry a common theme: an abiding sense of “disconnect” between their inner sense of self and the evidence of their body. In their deepest awareness, gender identity (who I know myself to be) has been in conflict with the social role their physical anatomy suggests (who others expect me to be).

Their essay is a good introduction to some of the issues that transgender people face, which are often remarkably similar to those that lesbian and gay people face because of the common thread of feeling pressure to conform to an identities which are not their true ones:

“In attempting to conform to the expectations of their parents, spouses and children, transgender persons often struggle to override this sense of disconnect. Some enter into marriage, hoping this will suppress the daily reminders that they are not as they appear. Many more put effort into presenting a ‘false self’ to the world, to protect against being discovered for who they really are. But the price of this unnatural effort is high. Alcohol and drugs offer false comfort along the way; suicide begins to appeal as an exit from this distress.”

And like many lesbian and gay people, many transgender people experience their transition to their true selves as a spiritual journey:

“. . . [M]any report a profound shift in their spiritual lives, as they turn from the condemnation of a judging God (‘You are going to hell’) to the embrace of a God of paradox and extravagant love. This harrowing transition leads many to a confident embrace, at last, of  ’the person God always intended me to be.’ “

The Whiteheads point out that unfortunately many church leaders do not have the knowledge–or the motivation to acquire knowledge–about transgender people:

“Many Catholics regret that official statements of the Catholic church continue to support rigid notions of human nature, especially in regard to male and female gender. Here church leaders, consciously or not, continue a strategy that distances them from the genuine experience of many active church members. Official statements often mention the extravagant conduct of sexual exhibitionists or drug-addicted sex workers as typical of transgender persons. Hiding in plain sight are the many mature transgender Catholics in our own parishes. To remain willfully ignorant of, or contemptuous toward, this part of the human community exhibits a startling lack of compassion.”

They close with a prayer that should be offered by all Catholics:

“Let us pray that in the months ahead each of us — whether transgender or otherwise — may experience the grace of epiphany. May we meet one another in shared humanity, ready to move beyond hesitancy and suspicion on all sides. In the grace of these encounters we are likely to be surprised; we may at first feel uncomfortable. But these, perhaps, are marks of an epiphany. And if we stay alert, we may soon recognize here the splendid diversity of the body of Christ.”

–Francis DeBernardo, New Ways Ministry

Transgender Teacher Sues Catholic School Over Firing

A transgender teacher is suing a Catholic high school in Queens, New York, saying that he was fired after teaching there for more than 30 years because of deciding to begin to live out a female gender identity.

Mark Krolikowski

ABCNews.com reports:

“In a lawsuit, Mark Krolikowski, 59, alleges that after 32 years of teaching at St. Francis Prep in Queens, N.Y., and receiving numerous accolades for his work including leading students in a musical performance for Pope Benedict XVI, he was fired last year after the parents of a ninth grader complained about his appearance.

“Krolikowski remains anatomically male and routinely wore suits and neckties to school where he taught music, social studies and a class on human sexuality. He also wore earrings and manicured his nails in ‘a feminine style’ according to court documents.

“In 2011, Krolikowski was summoned to the office of the principal, Brother Leonard Conway, where he revealed that he was transgender and that he intended to start coming to work dressed as a woman. According to Krowlikowski’s lawsuit, Conway told the teacher that being transgender was ‘worse than gay’ and that he could no longer appear at public events if he planned to begin appearing as a woman.”

According to the New York Post, the controversy over the teacher’s gender identity arose when a parent complained to the principal about the teacher’s appearance:

“. . . a parent took issue with his look and reportedly went to school officials. The subsequent questions from his bosses forced Krolikowski to tell then-Principal Leonard Conway and assistant principal Patrick McLaughlin he was transgender, court papers state.”

The Post also reports that Krolikowski agreed

“. . . to tone down his appearance by losing the earrings and feminine nails, Krolikowski said he got stellar evaluations during the 2011-12 school year. Despite this, Krolikowski claims his bosses called him insubordinate in June 2012 for allegedly continuing to go ‘his own way,’ according to court papers.

ABCNews.com provided a comment from St. Francis’ Prep’s view of the case:

” ‘His employment was terminated for appropriate non-discriminatory reasons,’ said the school’s attorney, Phil Sempervivo.”

A group of current students and alumni have come to the defense of Krolilowski with a petition on Change.org, supporting the teacher and asking the school to offer an apology.  In part, the petition states:

” ‘Mr. K,’ as he was affectionately known by most of his students, had worked for SFP [St. Francis Prep] for over 30 years and was always himself: funny, eccentric, loving, and accepting. Ask anyone who had him and they will rave about his stellar teaching and friendly demeanor. In a school in which many of the faculty can often be bossy and tyrannical, Mr. K created a warm and welcoming environment for all his students and their peers.

“However, his long track record of spectacular teaching seemed to carry no weight when a lone parent complained about his ‘feminine’ appearance back in 2011. Mr. K, for as long as we have known him, has always donned several gold hoop earrings, dyed hair, fashionable (but appropriate and professional) clothing, and well-manicured nails. This was never an issue amongst his students or their parents until that one student’s mother complained to the school.

“This is a disgusting display of discrimination and must be acted against and apologized for. While we do not expect Mr. K to return to Prep, we do expect the school to apologize for its behavior and its ultimate decision to expel such a valued member from their staff. In a school that preaches love, respect, and acceptance, we are appalled to see that their lessons come with hateful fine print.”

–Francis DeBernardo, New Ways Ministry

 

The Best of 2012 in Catholic LGBT News

Yesterday, we posted our list of the worst of 2012 in Catholic LGBT news.  Today, as promised, we end the year on a positive note by presenting our list of the BEST of the previous year.  Much good has happened in 2012, with Catholics at all levels of the church speaking out for justice and equality for LGBT people.

Thanks to the 286 of you who voted in our poll to determine the selection and ranking of these best news stories.  The percentage following each story is the percentage of people who chose this item as one of their top five.

The Top Ten

1. Catholic lay support aids marriage equality victories in Maine, Maryland, Minnesota, and Washington State. 23.08%

2. Priests in Minnesota and Maryland publicly counter the local hierarchy’s opposition to marriage equality. 14.69%  

3. Berlin’s Cardinal Rainer Maria Woelki suggests that the church should treat gay and straight couples similarly. 9.09%  

4 & 5.  TIE                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                             Bishop Richard Malone in Maine announces that the diocese will not take an active political role against the state’s marriage equality referendum. 8.39%                                                                                                                                                                                                                                         Surveys show increase in support for LGBT issues among Hispanics, especially Catholics. 8.39%

6. At New Ways Ministry’s Seventh National Symposium, Australia’s Bishop Geoffrey Robinson calls for the church hierarchy to re-think its sexual ethics teachings. 8.04% 

7 & 8. TIE                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    The University of Notre Dame gives official recognition to a gay-straight alliance after years of student activism. 5.24%                           Austrian Cardinal overturns a pastor’s decision to bar a gay man from serving on a parish council. 5.24%

9. Catholics in Media Associates gives its top award to TV’s Modern Family, a show featuring a gay family. 3.85%  

10. Maryland priest who denied communion to a lesbian woman at her mother’s funeral is removed from pastoral ministry. 3.5%  

Editor’s Note:  One item which we neglected to add to the list for voting was that Vice President Joe Biden, a  Catholic, endorsed marriage equality, paving the way for President Barack Obama to do the same.  Biden also referred to transgender equality as “the civil rights issue of our time.”  We feel these should deserve some mention on the list of the best Catholic news of 2012.  We regret that we didn’t include them for voting.  Mea maxima culpa.

Other items

Cardinal Francis George apologizes for comparing the LGBT community to the Ku Klux Klan. 2.45%  

Ontario requires all schools, including state-supported Catholic schools, to institute gay-straight alliances. 2.1%  

Jesuit author James Martin endorses Spirit Day, a national program to end bullying of LGBT youth. 2.1% 

Pastor at Most Holy Redeemer parish in San Francisco reverses his earlier decision to ban drag queens from parish events. 1.75%

Students at Stonehill College, a Catholic campus in Massachusetts, win a new and improved non-discrimination policy. 1.4%  

–Francis DeBernardo, New Ways Ministry

The Worst of 2012 in Catholic LGBT News

As the year 2012 winds to a close, it’s time to review the news of the Catholic LGBT world of the past 12 months. In today’s post, we will look at the  stories of the worst happenings of the past year, and in tomorrow’s post, we will look at the best stories.  Bondings 2.0 asked you for your feedback on what the worst and best news stories of the past year were, so the ranking of these stories is based on your responses.  The percentage following each story is the percentage of people who chose this item as one of their top five. Thank you to all 311 of you who participated.

The Top Ten

1. The Parliament in Uganda, a pre-dominantly Catholic nation, re-introduces a bill to make the death penalty a possible sentence for lesbian and gay people.  16.34%

2. The Vatican censures the Leadership Conference of Women Religious for, among other things, their support of LGBT issues and New Ways Ministry. 15.69%

3. Pope Benedict opens the year by stating that new models of family are a threat to “human dignity and the future of humanity.” 14.05%

4. The Knights of Columbus have contributed $6.5 million to oppose marriage equality over the past seven years, according to an Equally Blessed report. 12.09%

5. A Catholic lesbian woman in Maryland is denied communion at her mother’s funeral Mass. 10.13% 

6. The Vatican censures Sister Margaret Farley, a theologian who has supported the moral goodness of gay and lesbian relationships. 6.86%  

7. U.S. bishops attempt to make religious liberty an issue as a way to defeat marriage equality initiatives. 6.54%

8. Minnesota teen is denied confirmation for supporting marriage equality. 4.9%

9 & 10. TIE:                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  The Catholic University of America again denies a request for recognition of a gay-straight alliance on campus. 2.29%                               Several Catholic church employees are fired because of their support of marriage equality. 2.29%

Other items:

In several cases, the Catholic Campaign for Human Development withdraws funding from organizations which support LGBT equality. 1.96% 

Catholic theologian Tina Beattie is disinvited from a fellowship appointment at the University of San Diego because of her support of marriage equality. 1.63%  

The U.S. Catholic bishops investigate the Girl Scouts of America for connections to liberal causes, including LGBT equality. 1.63%  

Minnesota’s Archbishop John Nienstedt instructs his priests not to speak publicly in support of marriage equality. 1.63%

A Catholic high school in Indianapolis refuses to call a female-to-male transgender student by his male name. 0.98%

–Francis DeBernardo, New Ways Ministry

NEWS NOTES: December 24, 2012

Here are some news items which may be of interest:

1) Read the inspiring Huffington Post story of Sister of Charity Margaret Farrell who works at Los Angeles’ Covenant House, a shelter and social service agency for homeless teenagers.  Of her work, Sister Margaret says:

“Some say, how can I, as a nun, surround myself with such people — gays, transsexuals, HIV-positive clients?”I usually respond: Read the Bible. Look which people Jesus surrounded himself with.”

2) According to a LGBTQNation.com story, the Human Rights Campaign (HRC) has called upon the Maryland Catholic Conference (MCC) to publicly denounce Michael Peroutka’s $10,000 donation to the Maryland Marriage Alliance (MMA), the coalition which organized the state campaign to overturn marriage equality.  Peroutka is a member of  the League of the South, a neo-Confederate, secessionist organization labeled an “explicitly racist” hate group by the Southern Poverty Law Center.The MCC was a founding organizer of the Maryland Marriage Alliance. HRC is also calling on the MMA to return the donation.

3) The Supreme Court of Mexico, a heavily Catholic nation, has issued a decision that paves the way for marriage equality to become legal in the entire nation, according to the AfterMarriage blog.   Marriage equality is already legal in Mexico City, the nation’s capital district.

4) Joseph Amodeo, a Catholic writer who blogs at HuffingtonPost.com, offers “A Catholic Reflection on HIV/AIDS and the Call to Love,” which was originally presented as a talk on December 1, 2012, World AIDS Day,  at St. Augustine Catholic Church, Brooklyn, New York.

–Francis DeBernardo, New Ways Ministry